God is not finished

You know that saying, "if you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans"

I think God has had quite the laugh with the plans I have told Him

First, I told God I wanted to meet a guy in college, get engaged senior year, then get married summer after graduation,  have 2.5 kids, live in a suburb close to family, have safe-comfortable job, a house with a white-picket fence, oh and a dog

How did that turn out?

Married? No 

Dating? Haha 

Kids? Only my amazing nephews

White picket fence? Only around the apartment pool

 Dog? No but lots of stray cats around here  

Suburb? Nope- Right next to the Phoenix airport- Glamorous 

Close to family?  1,421 miles away actually 

Safe-comfortable job? Challenges me DAILY

See, I never once told Him I wanted to be challenged in my faith 

I never told Him I wanted to leave my comfort zone

And you better believe I never told Him I wanted to move to Arizona

You guys, it hit 100 degrees today! 

The point of this is that we can plan out our life as detailed as we want

But ultimately God plans for our life will prevail

"Many are the plans in a person's heart, 

but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails."

Proverbs 19:21 

He will challenge us to get out of our comfort zone

He will correct us, push us and guide us

But in doing so He takes us to places we never imagined

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, 

according to his power that is at work within us"

Ephesians 3:20 

So though I am not living the life I told God I wanted

I am allowing God to write my story

And I know God is far from finished with my story

So remember, when you allow God to write your story, it will always better than yours

Let go and let God write

He writes the best love stories anyway 

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Such a time as this

So, it has been awhile since I have blogged

In fact , I look back at my last blog and it was well over a month ago

And its not that there has not been anything going on in my life

There actually has been some changes in my life

Which means I have a lot going on in my mind

Which also means I am still trying to figure out how to balance this thing called "life"

I wanted to write about the time my family came down at the end of March...

I wanted to write about all the amazing memories we made at the pool, at the ball park and at the Phoenix Zoo...

I wanted to write about the cutest nephews ever and how much I loved having them down here

I also wanted to write about how hard it was not go home with them and have a family dinner

I wanted to write that no one told me moving away would be this hard

I wanted to write that I cried all the way home form the airport and an hour after I got home

But I didn't and I have to be ok with that

This whole moving away from family is such a bitter sweet process

Home sickness hits me hard but then in an instant I can feel back on track

There is too much peace I feel when I think about my life in Arizona

The best is yet to come!

Palm Sunday with the family at my church City of Grace 

Anyway, I did want to write about the biggest change in my life

I started a NEW JOB!

I started April 1st the day after my family left Arizona

I moved down to Arizona with a burning passion was for non-profit

I knew the Lord was turning my life upside down and Arizona was only the beginning

I knew that my life work was going to consist of ministry and non-profit

I just had NO idea what direction

During the fall I started volunteering for Food for the Hungry

I loved the people and the mission

I volunteered under some really great people who have become great friends

Around February I told my friends at FH (Food for the Hungry) that I was looking for a job

They had no job openings but she sent a link from another non-profit that was looking

The non-profit is called Disciple Nations Alliance

"Helping the church rise to her full potential as Gods principal agent 

in restoring, healing and blessing broken nations"

You can read more about DNA HERE

After two interviews and lots of praying I got the job!

Definitely an answered prayer

"Delight yourself in the Lord and 

He will give you the desires of your heart"

Psalm 37:4

It has been only one full week since I have been working for DNA 

I have been challenged in the most humble way during this new job

My heart is being softened and ignited 

Equipped and prepared

You see,  I have BIG dreams and goals for my life

I believe God has given me the passion, desire and dreams to serve in a big way 

And when coming down here I thought I was ready for those dreams 

I thought that I had the knowledge of a non-profit

Turns out passion doesn't equate to knowledge or experience

I thought that I knew what God was doing around the world

Turns out I have no idea

I thought I was cultured and experienced because I have been to Ethiopia

Turns out, I am not 

Working at the DNA has been expanding my world view, my God view, in the most uncomfortable and exciting way possible

I know what God is doing in MY life

I know what God is doing in the lives of MY close family and friends

I see God moving in and out America's culture 

But I dont know what God is doing in the world around me

I am excited for this season to learn, absorb, prepare and get equipped 

This season I am learning to trust God and His timing 

I am learning God always knows what I need better than I do 

 I am learning that every season has a purpose during His Divine Plan for my life

I am learning to LOVE the season I am in while still keeping an expectant attitude

I am learning that God needs to do something IN me, so He can do something THROUGH me

---------------------

Every single season of our lives

 – the school years, single-hood, career building, marriage, parenthood, grandparent-hood

 – is a gift from God

 It’s not a means to our “all,” but rather part of it

That means every single one of us is living in a slice of our “all” at this very moment

When we grasp this thought, it will not only enable us to see the opportunities for learning and growth in this season, but also help us to embrace the exciting things that are going on right now

You see, it’s the seemingly insignificant and mundane moments of life – when we feel we are amounting to nothing – that God is using to get us ready for the next season

God is so faithful to bring fulfillment to the dreams He has placed in our hearts!

- Christine Caine 

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Mine

Just write! I keep telling myself this 

As I sit here at a local Starbucks (surprise!) I want to write but nothing seems to come to mind

When you are a wanna-be blogger, you feel you need to have some amazing blog post all the time

but I just want to write

I go back and forth from writing in my book and my blog

Yes, I want to write a book

I don't know if it will ever get published but I have been told I need to write anyway

I know God has placed a message on my heart I desire to share one day

But as I sit here, listening to OCEANS, watching the sunset, I cant help but feel overwhelmed

Overwhelmed for the life God has given me

It is not perfect, but it is mine

It is not always fun, but it is mine

It is not always easy, but it is mine
It is not always comfortable, but it is mine

Mine

This path the Lord has given me

Sometimes it can feel lonely, like I am the only one who is on this path 

But then I remember that I AM THE ONLY ONE

He leads us all along our unique paths

Designed just for us

Others might not understand or care

But they don't live our life and we don't live theirs

He may give us a big dreams, purpose and vision 

But the thing is, He only reveals His plans to us day by day, moment by moment

Never giving us more than we need or can handle

And then when the timing is right, He will help us understand what He was doing all along

Step by step

Day by day

Year by year 

I am living a life that is not perfect, but it is mine 

And it is going perfectly the way He wants it 

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Dear Jesus,

One of my favorite things to do is go to Starbucks and write

I have a new passion for writing down my thoughts and what God is doing in my life

One of my new goals is to write a book- eek!

But as I sit here tonight looking at another amazing sunset,
I cant help but think about where I was a year ago this month

One year ago this month is when I decided to move to Arizona

Of course, I didn't tell anyone right away

Maybe it was fear or maybe because if I did that meant I actually had to do it

One year ago when God said "GO"

One year ago God planted a seed of passion in my heart for Arizona

One year ago God gave me a vision for my life I never imagined

One year ago I was longing for a change in my heart

It has been one year since I knew Arizona was my new home
 I am complete awe of the way the Lord has transformed, prepared, molded & blessed my new life 

--------------------  

Dear Jesus, 

I don't know why You called me to be in Arizona but I love it here. You knew exactly where I needed to go even when I didn't see it yet. I look back at the years before Arizona and sometimes I forget my life in Seattle. Not in a bad way but when You open one door You close the door on the last chapter, keeping my eyes looking forward towards You. I am grateful for my life in Seattle because it reminds me where I come from and the life You brought me out of.  Thank You. 

I see now I wasn't living that passion and purposeful life you created me to live. I was just existing through life- You knew it wasn't how I was supposed to live. Back in the fall of 2011 You so gently opened my eyes to the life You had for me. Back then I didn't know what You were up too, but I knew You were moving and I was going somewhere. Thank you. 

You were compassionate. You didn't show me everything right away. If I knew You were going to take me away from my comfortable job, my family, to Ethiopia and then down to Arizona all in one year, I would have tried to hide from You. I would have told you "NO". It would have been to much. But instead, You started placing seeds of dreams and passion in my heart I never knew existed. You slowly put confidence and security in my heart to be bold in my faith and at the exact moment when You told me it was time for me to leave, I did with a grateful, excited, prepared and ready heart. Thank You. 

You have helped me to see the person I want to become in all aspects of my life; a woman, wife and mother. You opened my eyes to the brokenness of our world and You gave me a heart that breaks for it and wants to serve. Thank You. 

Jesus, I know I wasn't the easiest to work with. I argued, I fought, I cried out to You, I tried to bargain with You, and I doubted You but You never stopped pursuing, loving and showing me Grace. Thank You. 

Though my dreams started getting bigger, and my longings deeper, You placed contentment in my heart that I was right where I was supposed to be. Then in the middle of a fall friday You told me it was time to move on and you started opening doors and giving me Grace to pursue those dreams. Thank You. 

So, here I am in Arizona. I am in awe of my complete peace about being here. Never in my wildest dreams would I ever think this would be my life. Even in the midst of so much unknown Jesus, You give me peace. Thank you. 

Thank you for always giving me not what I wanted, but always what I needed and always better than imagine. Thank You for knowing me better than I know myself. I will continue to ask You to lead me into Your known plan for my life. 

Love, 

Your forever grateful daughter

PS- I cant end this letter without asking about my future husband. I mean where is he?! OK,  I know, I know. You are probably just giving me that look because we both know You have been whispering to me all along who he is and Your purpose of us. I know Jesus, I just get impatient :) Thank You for him and his passion, dreams, vision and leadership in our lives.  You are good! #bestisyettocome

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We Love Because He Loved First

This holiday means more to me than just decorating with hearts,

or having a special someone to buy you presents,

bring you roses and take you out to a fancy dinner

 (Though the hopeless romantic in me does look forward to that someday !)

To me, Valentines Day represents Pure, Sweet, Overwhelming, Passionate LOVE

All kinds of love that fills our life

Love for family

Love for friends

Love for your significant other

But those love stem from the most important love of all

The all consuming

deeply passionate

never ending

forever forgiving

and always flowing love from our Lord and Savior

For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, 
that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.
John 3:16 
 

God sent His only son to die FOR ALL OF US

And because of what Jesus did on the cross, because He gave the ultimate sacrifice 

He has showed us the truest, most passionate, sweet, pure, overwhelming love of them all

Now that is something to celebrate
(and to hang red hearts everywhere!)

"We love because He first loved us."

1 John 4:19

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Home And Away

Goodbyes are hard

Even when I technically already moved to Arizona

I moved to Arizona in July and in four short months I fell in love

But come November I decided to come home for the holidays

Nothing beats coming home for the holidays

 My days were filled with family, friends, traditions and lots of Starbuck 

My nephews couldn't get away from me

I loved being home and knew I needed this time before the "real" move came

As January 13th approached I was anxious and torn

I loved the comfort and security of home but loved the excitement of my future in Arizona
I also missed the friends I made in Arizona and the life I already created 

I started packing early today out of giddiness to head back
I said my goodbyes to my family holding back tears
My dad drove me to the airpot on a beautiful Seattle evening
We chatted about the adventure ahead and how I will always have home 

Mt. Rainier stunning as ever, something I forgot being in Arizona
But as I am finally settled and sitting at my gate and the tears start to fall

Oceans is playing which never helps

No matter how much I know Arizona is where I am suposed to be
No matter how much my heart is already in Arizona
No matter how many friends and comfort I have in Arizona
The truth is, when we pursue Gods will life gets hard 

He calls us out of our comfort... This is hard

He calls us to leave our friends and family... This is hard

He calls us to be brave and trust Him into the unknown... This is hard 

No matter how many times, goodbyes never get easier... This is hard 

But I hold onto this truth; 

When we pursue His will... life becomes purposeful 

When we pursue His will... life becomes adventurous 

When we pursue His will... life becomes joyful and hopeful

And when we act on His will we become obedient and Blessings come

I am once again leaving my comfort of home and into the unknown

I will be in Arizona in a new apartment, new roommate, and a new area to explore 

The tears will come, probably daily, and so will the many phone calls home 

Doubt and anxiety will creep into my soul when I am not on guard 

I know trials and tribulations are a guarantee in this life 

But I also know that I am stepping into something greater than my comfort 

This life is about eternity and bringing others with me 

This life is about expanding His Kingdom and bringing hope to this fallen and broken world 

I am stepping into complete surrender and obedience to Him 

I am trusting Him to guide my steps, my decisions, my words and my actions 

I am trusting Him that He is leading me into to His will for my life 

I am trusting and praying His Gory will shine bright in the way I live

I will continue to run my race towards Him wherever He takes me

The Lord has already placed dreams and visions on my heart
 I am trusting Him to show up in radical ways as His plan is revealed through my life 

"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine,
 according to His power that is at work within us.." 

Ephesians 3:20

view from our apartment in Phoenix

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Jesus Is...Christmas

"Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you: 

He is Christ The Lord." 

Luke 2:11

Sometimes you just need to talk a walk, listen to carols and build a cross to be reminded and thankful for a God who rebuilds

Last night night I tossed and turned like a little kid again

I looked at my alarm: 2:00am, 4:00am, then finally went off at 8:00am

It wasn't because the presents or the famous monkey bread my mom makes

(ok, maybe a little)

Christmas is a time to gather with family, share memories, and yes open gifts

It didn't snow, but the second best weather is cold and crisp

But my excitement was different this year because this year was different

Not because my older brother was home for the first time in 15 years

Or that my sister now has TWO adorable nephews

Or I live in Arizona now 

It was more than the physical presence of family that made Christmas different

Today we celebrate the most important part of God's ultimate Love Story to save the world!

I dont know about you, but to me thats worth being excited about!

"He comes vulnerable because He knows the only way to intimacy with you is through vulnerability with you. You cant get to intimacy except through the door of vulnerability. So God throws open the door of this world- and enters as a baby. As the most vulnerable imaginable. Because He wants the unimaginable intimacy with you."

- Ann Voskamp 

It is almost midnight on Christmas day

The presents have all been opened, the candles have blown out

The last of the dessert is put away and the last Hallmark movie has been watched

I sit here with a nostalgic heart as I think about the past month leading up to Christmas and the excitement that builds during this magical, holiday season

I am listening to the last of the Christmas carols on the radio

It just seems like only yesterday I started listening to Christmas music

(Some people say October might be too early, but I say a month is to short)

But those nostalgic feelings and memories turn to feelings of Hope and Joy 

 I realized this past year I don't actually have to wait until Christmas to receive the gift of Christmas

We celebrate the birth of Jesus today but the gift that He brings is received all year

This past year I have opened myself up to letting Jesus take over

He has taken me on an adventure that excites me more everyday

The gift of Christmas

The past year Jesus has romanced my soul into an intimacy I have never known

The Gift of Christmas

The past year Jesus has placed dreams and passions that have set my heart on fire 

The Gift of Christmas

The past year Jesus has given me endless amounts of Grace from my mistakes

The Gift of Christmas

The past year Jesus has shown Mercy in situations I labeled impossible

The Gift of Christmas

The past year Jesus has given me friends and family that have blessed me more than I deserve 

The Gift of Christmas 

Jesus has given me Salvation

The Gift of Christmas 

Jesus is... 

The gift of salvation 

The gift of Grace 

The gift of Love 

The gift of Blessings 

The Gift of Peace 

We can receive them every single day of the year 

As you take down your last bit of christmas decorations

As you begin to reschedule your work and school schedule 

As you begin to write your resolutions and To Do lists.. 

Remember...

Peace is not ultimately a place

Peace is the ultimate Person

Jesus

The gift of Christmas
The gift of Jesus 

You don't have to wait until next christmas to receive 

Receive it today and everyday 

The magic of Christmas truly lives in our hearts 

For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace."
Isaiah 9:6

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Infuse Your Dreams With Life

"Now faith is confidence in what we hope for 

and assurance about what we do not see"

Hebrews 11:1

My ultimate goal is to create a life that allows me to always say "YES" when God calls
Yes, I can serve. Yes, I will give. Yes, I will GO. 

This is my 2015 vision board

As I have said many times in this blog, the past three years have been one big dreamfest, if you will

Once I let the Lord take over my plans, He has placed me on a path I never imagine

Then came AdvoCare which has expanded my visions and I realized I need to dream bigger!

The best part is that through dreaming big and allowing the Lord to fill His purpose

He is also changing me in the process

Changing me for His glory 

Changing me or more of preparing me for those dreams...His plans

And when I really think about my dreams, like REALLY think about them

Would I be ready for them?

Am I ready for them?

You see, the Lord knows my dreams

He knows exactly which ones He will fulfill now 

There are some that I see Him gradually beginning the process

Then there are ones I have no idea how He will ever prepare me 

Those are the ones He knows I will need some more time to prepare

That is where faith comes in

Faith He knows

Faith that He is working on my behalf

Faith that spending time will increase my hope

Faith that He will infuse my dreams with life 

Faith is having confidence in what we hope for

Confidence the Him

Confidence in our dreams and visions

Assurance that even though we don't see the Lord,

"He is working things out for the good of those who live Him"

Faith is not thinking God can, but knowing He will

I am working on your behalf

Bring me all your concerns, including your dreams

Talk with Me about everything,

Letting the Light of My Presence shine on your hopes and plans

Spend time allowing My Light to infuse your dreams with life,

gradually transforming them into reality

-Jesus Calling 

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Much to be Thankful for

My brother Jon, (far right) is home for the first time in 15 years for Thanksgiving
The four Christensen siblings together again!
Chris, Beth, Me, Jon and Beth's kids Hudson & Jace 

This year I am changed

I feel different than years past 

I know I am different

And not because I live in Arizona, but because thankfulness floods my heart, daily

That has not always been the case

I have learned that happiness is not found in things, status or comfort ood

I have learned that the only true fulfillment is my relationship with Christ 

Because of Him, I have chosen to chase my dreams over complacency  

Because of Him, I have chosen to seek joy over self pity and doubt 

Because of Him, I have so much HOPE about my future I get giddy

Because of Him, I have found more peace 

I am Thankful 

The only explanation is the fact that I have chosen to seek the Lord in my life more intentionally 

I have chosen Him to lead, to guide and move in my life than ever before

I chose Him and He has provided 

I am thankful 

I have been so overwhelmed where my life has gone, I catch myself saying "that is just crazy" 

When really it is just our God being who He is 

Loving my time with my sister! 

My life brings new challenges, blessings and adventures daily  

Sometimes I wonder how I deserved such a blessed life

Then I remember that we don't deserve anything in this life

He graciously sacrificed for us on the cross so we can receive Him 

I am thankful 

God graciously gives us His Grace daily

He deeply loves and always forgives us 

He wants a relationship with us still 

We don't deserve, but He gives

Because that is who He is

He is worth all our praise and thankfulness

The whole Christensen family 2014

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