Sunday, April 21, 2013

Heaven on Earth

My sister and I LOVE Chris Tomlin, who doesn't?!
He is an amazing singer, song writer and worship leader
When his tickets went on sale in January we could not pass that opportunity 
We could not miss hearing the songs live that we have been listening blasting over and over again

I think My sister and I got a glimpse of Heaven last night
No, I would not even call it a glimpse
Heaven is 10 (insert infinity 0's) greater, better, more amazing
But I felt closer than I have ever been 

Last night was a worship experience I will never forget
There is nothing like being with thousands and praising the Lord

Lifting our hands
Pouring out our hearts
Singing His praises
One city
One Church

Our favorite song is Angel Armies
There is always some serious worship going on in my car with this song
Being able to experience live was amazing

I know Who goes before meI know Who stands behind
The God of Angel Armies
Is always by my side

 "Then I looked and heard the voice of many angels, numbering thousands upon thousands, and ten thousand times ten thousand. They encircled the throne and the living creatures and the elders"

Ten thousands is a rhetorical phrase for an indefinitely large number
Talk about one big army
Expect nothing less with God!
And to guess what?
That army is fighting for you and me

What would you do if you truly believed this army would always have your back?
It would seem impossible to fail right? 
It would be foolish to not continue the fight with this army

The Alpha and the Omega, who is and who was and who is to come
The Almighty

I would not want to experience this night with anyone else
We have grown together in this journey
I know God has great things planned for us and our families
We made a joke on the way home that the only night that will be better than this will be my wedding day :) 

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Friday, April 19, 2013

I Love You Regardless

Dear Jessie, my precious child,
I love you regardless of how well you are performing. Sometimes you feel uneasy, wondering if you are doing enough to be worthy of My Love. No matter how exemplary your behavior, the answer to that question will always be no, your performance and My Love are totally different issues, which you need to sort out. 
I love you with an everlasting Love that flows out from eternity without limits or conditions. I have clothed you in My robe of righteousness, and this is an eternal transaction; Nothing and no one can reverse it.
Therefore, your accomplishment as a Christian has no bearing on My Love for you. Even your ability to assess how well you are doing on a given day is flawed. Your limited human perspective and the condition of your body, with its mercurial variations, distort your evaluations. 
Bring your performance anxiety to Me, and receive in its place My Unfailing Love. Try to stay conscious of My loving presence with you in all that you do, and I will direct your steps.

The Lord came to us from far away, saying, “I have loved you with a love that lasts forever. So I have helped you come to Me with loving-kindness.
Jeremiah 31:3
"I will have much joy in the Lord. My soul will have joy in my God, for He has clothed me with the clothes of His saving power. He has put around me a coat of what is right and good, as a man at his own wedding wears something special on his head, and as a bride makes herself beautiful with stones of great worth."
- Isaiah 61:10
"Make Your face shine upon Your servant. Save me in Your loving-kindness."
- Psalm 31:16
"Let them give thanks to the Lord for His loving-kindness and His great works to the children of men!"
- Psalm 107:8
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Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Jamil and Jenzie Journals

I met my friend Jamil last year at the marketing convention, NACMA, in Dallas
Our friendship continued to grow rapidly throughout the year
He is one of my most encouraging, supportive friends I have
He pushes me in my faith and inspires me to chase my dreams
We have our own blog called "Jamil and Jenzie Journals"- Long story on Jenzie :)
We use the blog to write our thoughts, inspirations and anything that encourages us
We both feel God has placed us on one wild adventure and we wanted to share it with eachother
We share our dreams
Our goals
Our passions
Our love for Christ
Back and forth
We share our hearts
I decided today to share one of my most vulnerable post I wrote to Jamil last Saturday...

Hi Jamil!

I just got back from working a spring soccer game. However, I say "spring" loosely because the weather proved otherwise. It was sunny, then downpour, hail, sunny and now back to raining. I am sitting on my couch in Seattle, just had a nice dinner, wrapped up in a blanket with my favorite sweatshirt on, and the Mariners game is on in the background. One would say I have all the necessities in life to live. But am I really living? Am I really living the life God has intended me to live? Yes, I can survive but I just don't want to survive in this life. I want to really live, live for God and the passion He has placed on my heart.

My dreams and desires have been at an all time high this past week and I just don't know why. I went to a fundraiser breakfast the other morning for the Seattle Matt Talbot center. What a wonderful organization. It gives the homeless a second chance at life. A Christian based foundation that is doing amazing things in Seattle. After the breakfast I was full of gratitude for the employees and sponsors for this organization. I am thankful that God gave us all different hearts to serve different brokenness of this world.

But you know what I kept thinking about?
You know what my heart longs for?
You know what my heart is on fire for?
I want to serve, help, give hope to children and their families
ALL over the world

Physically, my heart aches
Mentally, my mind is elsewhere
Emotionally, I am longing. Longing for more

Jamil, I have never been so sure of something in my life. I sit here on my couch and my heart continues to ache as I write this because I believe that my life passion is to serve, cherish and work with children, locally, nationally, and even internationally. I have no doubt God has placed this on my heart for a reason. I know God is preparing me for something greater than I have ever imagined, and much greater than myself.

Yet, my heart still aches. I don't know where or what that entails for me, but those desires have only grown. I think my running for charities is only the stepping stone to what God has planned. Which is very exciting, almost exhilarating knowing I could spend my life doing what I love. (sigh)

This was a very spur of the moment blog. No pre planning, just something on my heart at the moment. I am so thankful for you and this opportunity to write my feelings to you. God has placed me on an amazing, extraordinary journey...both of us:)

Hope you are having a great weekend!
Love you!


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Sunday, April 7, 2013

Forget Not All His Benefits

Good morning!

It is a quiet and rainy Sunday morning in Seattle
I am sitting at my usual place, a place I have come to cherish
A place at our table, His table
These morning devotions have become a time I long for
A time for me to praise, thank and worship our Creator 
I think about where I was not even a year ago and I see how lost I really was
But God doesn't leave us wondering
He promises to find us when we seek Him
He found me in my deepest longings and prayers 
He is there to stay

Anyway, onto my thoughts this morning
I can be very forgetful sometimes
My mind just draws a blank and the next thing you know my keys are locked in my car
Or I forgot why I literally just walked into my kitchen 
Yet, for some reason I can still recite almost every line to 3 Ninjas and Christmas Vacation
(I blame it on my amazing childhood) 

How about the instant panic, almost embarassing panic, when you realize you forget your phone
We have ALL been there
People are forgetful
We are forgetful
But you know what is worse then forgetting your phone?
...When we forget God

Something so easy for us to do in a world that is rigged to tempt us
Convince us to believe that we can forget God and still live in peace
A world that is constantly pulling us from one distraction to another 

When we forget God, we forget where we have been and where we are going

When I look back at my life I see that God has been faithful through it all
All the trials, valleys, peaks, twists, turns, doubts and fears
Through that awkward middle school stage where sitting at the "popular" lunch table is the only thing that matters
Those years in high school when I doubted friendships and felt peer pressure all around me
When I doubted my ability to play basketball at a DII university 
The time I felt completely lost because the career I thought I wanted was not my passion
Those times I gave my heart away to easily to look for fulfillment in a man
The health scare with my dad this winter and I thought for sure I wouldn't be able to handle the diagnosis
The times I felt abandon by God and the thoughts of "why me" or "I would be that girl"
Was God good?
Was God faithful?
Yes! Yes! and absolutely Yes!

O my soul, bless God.
    From head to toe, I’ll bless his holy name!
O my soul, bless God don’t forget a single blessing!

Every single past moment He delivered me through
Every single past moment made me stronger
Those past slides of my life I see God's hand on me through it all
You know how I know?
Because I am still here
Stronger than ever with a love for Him so deep it scares me
With dreams I never thought possible
Because of my past, I can see where I have been 
Because of my past, I can see where I am going
I know where God has delivered me

My past gives me faith for the future
My faith builds and increases because He was good!
Every single past moment God was Good
Every single past moment God was faithful

He will continue to be Good and Faithful
 He will continue to prepare me for His future plan
I have a purpose in this life
His purpose
For His Glory

Yet, it is still so easy to get distracted in this world
When things are going great in life it is easy to get content
When we go through trials and tribulations it is easy to abandon Him
We easily forget we need Him 
When that happens, lets rewind my friends
Rewind the tapes of your life and be reminded where God has delivered you
He delivered you from your past and He will deliver you still
Let your past build your faith for the future

Let us rewind so we never forget all His benefits

He forgives your sins—every one.
He heals your diseases—every one.
He redeems you from hell—saves your life!                                                          
He crowns you with love and mercy—a paradise crown.
He wraps you in goodness—beauty eternal.                                                       
He renews your youth—you’re always young in his presence

Psalm 103:1-5

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Saturday, April 6, 2013

Final Four & Life Lately

The Final Four is on in the background
I almost forgot it was on until my sister mentioned something to me
Whaaat!? I know
Surprisingly, I am not much of a basketball watcher I can watch NFL all day but ask me to watch basketball all day and I just cant do it
So, I am deciding to blog a bit while it plays in the background
But if you are wondering...
Gotta love an underdog!

Anyway, it has been awhile since I have given an update on what is going on
Lots of running, lots of work and lots of dreaming :)

My half is less than one month away!
21 days in fact and each day closer I am getting more excited!
Running has become easier thanks for my good friend Quinn who has been running the long runs with me. In fact, this morning we did a 10 mile run! I still cant wrap my mind that I actually ran 10 miles. I am just so thankful for Quinn for taking the time to run with me! Truly makes a huge difference with a running partner! 

What I am reading

This book is amazing
Judah Smith is one of the most engaging pastors/leaders I have ever heard 
 He is real
He speaks the truth
He pushes us to truly dig deeper on what we believe about Jesus
Jesus is_____
You fill in the blank :) 

I have yet to find a home church up here in Seattle
I know right?! I have lived up here the past 7 years!
It has always been on my heart and I know the Bible is pretty clear about surrounding yourself with other believers and having that fellowship but for some reason I just didnt feel a true calling to find a church up here. I went home a lot to Hope Lutheran and my sisters church 
I was filled with those churche but I still felt I needed to find something more permanent up here

My roommates have been going to The City Church for awhile but I just never felt the urge to go
Insert Jesus Is_____ and Judah Smith
I first saw him on CNN as he was on his book tour!
 I just had to see Justin Biebers pastor!
Sadly,yes, it took me to see him on TV and write a book for me to attend
But I dont care I got to a church service and now I dont want to leave
I am excited that I finally found a church that I long to attend

What I have been listening too

LOVE MercyMe
SPIRIT 105.3 has been my #1 radio station 
I just love being in a constant state of worship as I am driving
You may or may not finding me raising my hands and shouting along to the songs
Especially Chris Tomlin- Angel Armies

Favorite PINTEREST quotes 

The past couple mornings I have woken up to birds chirping outside my window
One of my favorite ways to wake up too

I declare!
This rings so true in my life at the moment
I see things and places in my life I never imagined
I feel God working in ways I never thought possible
I have dreams and longings that fill up the deepest parts of my heart

One day, it will all come together and everything will make perfect sense

What I am LOVING 

My new prayer journal
Since starting my new bible study I decided to start writing down thoughts and prayers that might be too personal for my blog
I am SO excited for this new adventure with these girls and can feel God preparing and creating us for great things for His Kingdom!

Speaking of His Kingdom, I got my copy of The Bible Series!
Ever since it was over last weekend I have been longing to watch it all over again!
Thankfully, I pre ordered it and got it early!

Africa 2014
I cant write about this dream enough
I sit here terribly sore from my 10 mile run
Headache and leg pains ache my body more then I thought
But I have never felt more "healthy" 
I have never been more filled and complete in His love
The more I learn about our God
The more I commit to His ways and guidance
The more my dream to travel to Africa grows 

And I still do not know where I am going in life
I don't know what tomorrow or my future holds
But I do know who is planning my life
That gives me peace and confidence 


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Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Lead us for His Glory

As I was listening to Pandora, this song came on
As I was listening, something was stirring up in my heart
So, I googled the lyrics!
There is just something so adventurous, exhilarating,
and at times mind-blowing thrilling to know that God has called us
to live higher, to go deeper
 To go where He leads us
He doesnt want us to live an ordinary life by the standards of this world
We are called to go higher- go deeper
Let Him lead us for His Glory

"Called Me Higher"
All Sons and Daughters 

And I could hold on
I could hold on to who I am and never let You
Change me from the inside
And I could be safe
I could be safe here in Your arms and never leave home
Never let these walls down
But You have called me higher
You have called me deeper

And I'll go where You will lead me Lord

You have called me higher
You have called me deeper
And I'll go where You lead me Lord
Where You lead me
And I will be Yours, oh
I will be Yours for all my life

And I will be Yours, oh
I will be Yours for all my life
So let Your mercy

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Tuesday, April 2, 2013

He Is Risen

"For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him."
John 3:17

I have always known that "Jesus died for our sins'
I was taught to be thankful that He died instead of me
So of course I was thankful!
But I never fully understood what that truly meant
Jesus died for me?

On that day, Jesus was crucified
The Creator took the fall for the created
The Innocent One bore the punishment for the convicted;
and the Savior of all mankind spread open His arms in love for you and I,
when he died on that cross
 - lifting the heavy weight of our sins onto himself

He died so we may live
He died and took on EVERY SIN
Past, present and future of ALL mandkind
That is A LOT of sin

But this Easter is different than the past
Not only has my faith grown
But my love for Jesus has ignited full force in my heart
I have a passion for Him deeper than I ever thought possible
I have gotten to know Jesus more
I have fallen more in love with our loving and almighty God
He has become my best friend
My #1 relationship in my life


So, this Easter was more than being thankful what Jesus did for us 
This Easter, for the first time, I truly saw (thanks to the amazing Bible Series) and felt what it meant for Jesus, best friend whom I LOVE deeply, die for me
My best friend was betrayed
My best friend was beaten down
My best friend mocked and spit on
My best friend was crucified for me
For me!?
All our selfishness, pride, doubt- ALL our sin

But death doesn’t win

Jesus Christ died on the cross for my sins
On the 3rd day He rose from the dead
Because He the power to defeat death
He has the power to give eternal life
And guess what!? He is offering it to all of us as a gift
FREE GIFT of Eternal life
You don’t need to work for it
You don’t have to pay for it
You don’t have to be good enough
"Come as you are, I did all the work for you
Because He lives, we can face tomorrow
Because He lives, we have faith, hope and love
Because He lives, we have the gift of eternal life

May you always remember the power upon that cross and the love from our Savior to die for us and give us eternal life

I got to spend the weekend loving on this little one!

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