Tuesday, November 18, 2014

It feels like home to me

I have lived in Arizona for exactly four months
I miss my family
I miss my friends
I miss the cold weather in Washington
I miss my scarves, boots and sweaters
I miss the golden leaves
I miss my nephews more each day

Next week I will head to Enumclaw, WA for the holidays
Nothing brings more joy than being home for the holidays

But if I am honest, I will miss Arizona
I will miss my new friends
I will miss my church family
I will miss my Crossfit buddies 
I will miss holiday church activities
I will miss the crisp 70 degree weather 
I will miss Arizona because my heart has found a home

In the past four months my heart has found comfort in Arizona
The past four months I have cultivated a community that brings me joy
The past four months I have been on one big adventure that excites my soul
Arizona is home to me now 

I look back at my life and the old me would never leave Washington
The old me would never want to leave the comfort of her family to live in another state
The only explanation I can give is that when you surrender your life to The One who gave it to you, He gives you new confidence, places you in a new direction, a new adventure and gives you new dreams

You don't always see the end but He guides you in the right direction
He starts opening your eyes to the brokenness of this world and your soul will break
You start longing for others to see themselves as Christ sees them
You start longing for purpose in your community, nation and world
Your eyes are open to the sinfulness of human kind (especially your own) 
and you question why people do what they do

But then you realize your own need for more of Jesus
More of His love, faithfulness, compassion and kindness towards others
People do not need more condemnation or judgement but more love and acceptance
You realize you have a lot of growing to do but are up for the challenge

This is what happened to me as the Lord sent me to Arizona
I still dont know why but I am thankful He did
I am learning everyday that life is a wonderful journey full of ups and downs,
lots of brokenness but also lots of joy
He has placed big dreams, desires and visions on my heart that I long to pursue
Not ones I ever dreamed of as a little girl
but better then I imagined

As I sit here in a Starbucks, listening to Christmas carols, excited about next week,
 I am thankful
I am thankful the Lord took me out of a life of just "existing" and into "living"
I am thankful He took me out of my comfort zone and into the unknown
I might not have a stable job, place to live in Arizona
The world might think I am crazy
But more than ever I know I am finally living
Living a life for Christ is the only way I know how to live
The only way I want to live

So, truly, there is nothing like being home for the holidays
I know I am blessed with this opportunity
I wont always have this time to be home for Thanksgiving til New Year 
I am going to soak up every ounce I can with my family in Washington
Enjoy time with my friends and our family traditions

But there is something exciting and hopeful knowing I will return to Arizona
My heart swings back and forth between the need for routine and the urge to GO
Arizona is just the beginning

"Therefore GO and make disciples of all nations, 
baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit"
Matthew 28:19


  1. Love this post. :) And I want to try crossfit someday.

  2. I stumbled across your blog from My New Lines. Thanks for this post! My husband and I moved away from our families just before our first son was born and spent 5 years in Houston. For the first couple of years, I missed "home" terribly, but we've recently moved back and I'm amazed by how much I miss Houston! There are things to love about every place, and it's always inspiring to see how the Lord will help us serve wherever we are led.


I would love to hear how you are enjoying your journey!